Fred Hoyle
— ASTRONOMER-GENERAL OF THE ROYAL SOCIETY! DO YOU SEE THE BATTLE STATION APPROACHING FROM THE SORTHWEAST??!!
— YES!!!
Do not open this book[edit | edit source]
‘Your years of toil,’
said Ryle to Hoyle,
‘Are wasted years, believe me.
The steady state
is out of date;
Unless my eyes deceive me,
My telescope
has dashed your hope;
Your tenets are refuted.
Let me be terse:
Our universe
Grows daily more diluted!’
Said Hoyle, ‘You quote
Lemaitre, I note,
And Gamow, well, forget them!
That errant gang
And their Big Bang –
Why aid them and abet them?
You see, my friend,
It has no end
And there was no beginning,
As Bondi, Gold,
And I will hold
Until our hair is thinning!’
‘Not so!’ cried Ryle
With rising bile
And straining at the tether;
‘Far galaxies
Are, as one sees,
More tightly packed together!’
‘You make me boil!'
Exploded Hoyle,
His statement rearranging:
‘New matter’s born
Each night and morn,
The picture is unchanging!’
‘Come off it, Hoyle!
I aim to foil
You yet’ (The fun commences)
‘And in a while,’
Continued Ryle,
‘I’ll bring you to your senses!’
- ↑ The above poem is clearly an ancient Roman manuscript dating from the third century Jesus Christ.