JFK vs. KFC, Starring FUCKING XENU as the vatickan poope

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DO NOT ASK YER COUNTRY TO DO YOU. DO YER CUNTRY. NIRVANA IS YOURS. Kurt Cobain. You will know him, I prophesy to you. Two decades or more hence, he will be born in Washington state. He will- dammit everyone's gone. Well. I might as well get fried chicken. There's a newly opened Kentucky Fried Chicken across the street. How lucky.

I would like a 10 piece bucket plea- OH WOW LOOK AT ALL THESE AFRICAN AMERICANS. There's like two in the entire restaurant Oh my God! Sir, are you being racist? No, I am all for racial integration, I think MLK was a cool guy but Malcolm X is sort of an asshole, not entirely but his ideology is- THE CHICKEN IS HERE! Oh but it smells like human flesh. Burnt flesh. This isn't chicken is it? No. It's...uh...

BANG!

The Sniper! Who was it. And how the gerinch stoll Exmas. A true Sotry[edit]

IT WAS COLONEL SANDERS HIMSELF. The gun it was a snipy gun with future laser eye surgery telepathivision! And in the future there was flying horse and buggies!!! Flying space blimps!! YOU'VE BEEN STEAMPUNK'D

The grench stole CHRISTmas by removing december twenteefifth frum every calandar on Earf. Wil Smith as the Fresh Pince of Bell-Air

Yet a nother twist from M. Night Fuckyoudiniweeniepratya from Pennsyltransylvania!!![edit]

JFK WAS DEAD THE WHOLE TIME! PAUL DIED IN A CAR CRASH I KNOW THIS FROM THE INTERNET THE INTERNET IS GOD GOD IS NOT REAL AND ANOTHER THINGgggdkdkf.$;$58$-'$48&&kfjfkdj

God's rath

How many fucking subections are there this is getting ridiculous I quit[edit]

Drink Disney-brand glitter glue or Olaf's evil true form will freeze you to death, kids

Of the Autoerotic Antichrist Archectype Architects that brought you Shrekk and Donky[edit]

I found Jeffrey Katzenberg, he is the real Jeff the Killer and ur next

End of the Universe of Teddy Bears on Acid and Cocaine Brain Spain (IT DOESN'T EVEN MATTEEEEEER...what a shitty band Linkin Park is like seriously I hate them listen to the Flaming Lips if you want alternative you idiot)[edit]