Minutes

A unit of time measurement. You will have approximately 36,792,000 of these before you experience death. According to the law of Smith-Jones who ever they may be, itz cuz its so vague! like a lioplerodon doing coitus to an orca, minutes pass more quickly when you are having fun, and more slowly when you are bored, due to the gravitational-quantum quark lensing effect causing a doppler shift in the neuro-time array.