Retard is the polar opposite of an untard. It is base off the verb "tard", with means "to barge into people's kitchens and slapping a giant Colorform of the letter D onto all the tarts one can find". To be a retard is to do that more than once, usually on a repeating basis. Retards are notoriously judgmental and tend to be Pantheists in faith.
Retards are generally classified as belonging to the Tardus Gromus Hetrus Faxus species of Humanalia. It is the distant cousin of the Leotard, which is someone who does that thing to tarts that was mentioned before, but they turn into a lion when they do that. It's sick to watch it happen. It's like Animorphs, but in your kitchen!
Testification - Wahey!
Testify, brotha! TESTIFY!!!