Rocket Surgery

From Illogicopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

“It's not rocket surgery, ya know?”

~ Oh wait, yes it is.

Rocket Surgery is an astromedical procedure designed to help little hurted rockets get over their boo-boos. It requires extreme intelligence to perform, kind of like rocket science and brain surgery, only both together at the same time. Very hard!

Methods[edit | edit source]

Lighting a match[edit | edit source]

This helps rockets that aren't launched get off the ground.

Tailfin replacement[edit | edit source]

Prostetic tailfins are ... wait rockets are already artificial, how can they have prostetic limbs? Like, a robot with a peg leg? that wouldn't make sense unless he (the robot) was a pirate. Maybe rockets are secretly robot pirates! cool!!

Or maybe they aren't artificial ... do they grow on Rocket Trees? Like money?

Countdown[edit | edit source]

This is a psychological treatment that involves counting backwards from ten until the psychologist reaches zero, then saying "blast off!" This helps rockets get going on their launching, which is the main focus of their lives, and if they get distracted from it, this is deviant behavior that is probably caused by some kind of repression due to a bad experience in their early childhood. (Probably as a dud firecracker)

Results[edit | edit source]

Rockets that are successfully treated by means of Rocket Surgery tend to not fail in their launching, which makes the procedure very useful to NASA.

Fun facts[edit | edit source]

Rocket surgery is illegal in Brazil.

The first book about rocket surgery was written by Dr. Willem Dafoe.

Most rocket scientists are up handed.