Scientific science

From Illogicopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Crazy Science redirects here. Think of it as the opposite of scientific science.

“Nobody messes with retarded scientists!”

~ Joel from Bonus Stage

Scientific science also known as scientism (as distinguished from the plain old boring type) is a fundamental concept of logic which states that anything that any Scientist says must be true, even if it has nothing whatsoever to do with their own field of study. Qualifications are irrelevant - they are mere formalities and ancient taboos which must be swept away to make room for progress.

One does not need even recognition from other Scientists to be a Scientific Scientist. All one needs is a lab coat, a really thick dorky looking pair of glasses and a cheesy German accent. (Optionally, a fake one)

Einstein did it! So can you!

Branches of Scientific Science[edit | edit source]

Laboratories[edit | edit source]

Aperture Science[edit | edit source]

Aperture Science does what they must (because they can) for the good of all of us except the ones who are dead.

Black Mesa[edit | edit source]

Heh. You thought you could get some help from Black Mesa. That's a laugh. Fat chance.

Muppet Labs[edit | edit source]

Muppet Labs is at the forefront of soft and cuddly ways to torture Beaker. For science!

Notable Scientific Scientists[edit | edit source]

MC Hawking[edit | edit source]

MC Hawking is one of the most famous scientific scientists, and he is even able to get away with not having a german accent because he uses a computer voice to talk. Ever since he proved himself as a capable scientific scientist, now anyone who can't manage the German accent is able to use speech synthesizers instead. Cool!!

Mr. Spock[edit | edit source]

Mr. Spock Rocks the Socks off your X-Box, droppin Blocks on Goldilocks Locks on her um ... automobile of some kind ... which is not the U.S.S. Enterprise and thus has no relevance to Star Trek and we know anything that isn't relevant to Star Trek is illogical, all thanks to Mr. Spock. Fascinating...

Dr. Franklin Anderson[edit | edit source]

Maker of teeny clones!!