School house rock

This article was forked from

to preserve the sanity under mysterious circumstances.
The uncyc version is
here.

“Lovely Lady Liberty with her book of recipes and the finest one she's got is the great American melting pot.”

~ Great America on melting pots

“Collectables such as pretzels can become moldy if not tended to”

~ Unrelated Quote Guy on School house rock

The Beginning

The orgin of School house rock (not to be confused with it's evil brother, Schoolhouse Rock)is unidentified. Some people beleive the shot heard around the world was to blame. shot heard 'round the world was the start of the Revolution. The Minute men were ready on the move! After the creation of School House rock it was believed that people all really wanted a bit of elbow room. School house rock was so crowded and useless that it was a bustling world. Everybody needs some elbow room, elbow room! Congress was contemplating to make a bill banning school house rock from exsistance.The bill was to down in the dumps, and he said, "I'm just a bill. Yes, I'm only a bill.

And I'm sitting here on Capitol Hill." Congress was unimpressed and made a bill anyway. The bill was only turned down, and the poor, despondent bill went into dire straits and eventually killed himself by diving into a pool of conjunctions. The conjunctions went into a chorus of "Conjunction Junction, what's your function?.... Destroying lives and eating up chives!"

Here is the bill trying to make a friend shortly before he killed himself.

An outlaw who had been causing trouble lately (this guy enjoyed killing ants!) heard about the tragedy of the sad bill. He went by the name of Lucky Seven Sampson. Lucky wanted to kill all school house rockers for no apparant reason other than the bills death. (No one knows why he wanted revenge, because lucky hated Mr. Bill after he stole his girlfriend) Lucky broke into the studio and shot everyone inside. As everyone was getting shot they screamed "Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, get your adverbs here!" The only logical reason for them saying "Lolly" was that they were in so much pain they got Lucky mixed up with lolly.

That was the end of school house rock. Lucky soon died after the massive shooting from a heart attack. The only School House rocker left was Rufus Xavier Sarsaparilla who survived the massacre. He went on to create Whore House Rock. His new sensation was only a hit in a small town named Frankstinville in Turkey.

What Happened In Turkey

Teachers In Turkey are recently going on strike on what appears to be porn videos. Turkish Children are poisoned with Rufus Xavier Sarsaparilla's (We can just call him 'he') insane ideas. He got his angry tribe of pronouns including his sister,the Major Rafaella Gabriela Sarsaparilla. The Pronoun Army went crazy becauce they couldn't stand the pressure. By the year 1902 all of Frankstinville was destroyed. Most of the people in the town had their heads so overwhelmed with pronouns that their heads asplode.

Aftermath

The Pronoun Army was eventually destroyed after joining the Nazis. Rufus and his new pet, Albert Andreas Armadillo, Ran away to Lesotho(the most desolate place they could find). They are both married to beautiful natives and are happily eating all the poisonous beatles they can get their hands on.