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A twatt is a small mechanical device used to slap lampshades. It was invented by T. Watt in 1876 in his shed.

It is popular in Japan and has sold more than bread and other essentials. The Japanese poet Basheh even wrote a poem about it...


BATT BATT de reggae beat

Scholars now believe this was a treatise on afro-funk.


Lamps look bad at the best of times and a twatt can dispase of it fabij.

Presidents and kings throughout the globe use it in their leisure. It has golfers.


When held close to an ostrich it turns punky and sprouts a woody trunk. If this should happen call Jazz.

See A.S.O[edit]