Xavier: Renegade Angel

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“I'm a survivor. We're a dying breed.”

~ Xavier:Renegade Angel

Xavier: Renegade Angel is a documentary film in 6 parts outlining the basis of reality and the importance of mental hygiene. The film makers, John Lee, Vernon Chatman, Jim Tozzi and Alyson Levy, drew inspiration from stories of rebel Zen Buddhist monks who make psychogenic cheeses to infiltrate the Rosicrucians every other Thursday during leap years. For centuries these intrepid meditators have stockpiled weapons grade dog farts as a rebuff against threats of genetically modified foods becoming sentient.

“Sacrée merde!”

On some planets, reincarnation involves eating carrots and playing the shakashuri. Blended wines are more popular among the ruling classes, beating themselves with sticks. Bovine steroids are ingested periodically where cupcakes are sold, forcing the general populace to text one another frantically with philosophical meanderings.

Is this Belgium?[edit | edit source]

No.

What Life D-D-Doth[edit | edit source]

Some people watch the Simpsons for philosophical inspiration. Others read Plato. Xavier had the good fortune to have his very own Chief Master Guru.

“ Life. You could say it started when I was a kid. Like most folks, I've always been different. But not like the others. Other kids could be cruel, they'd call me names: dweeb, chimp, honky, dweeby-chimp, honky-dweeb, and worst of all: chomsky-honk. Did you know there's over eighty-seven combinations of those soul-scalding words? I found out the hard way.”

~ Xavier:Renegade Angel

Chief Beef Loco[edit | edit source]

“Now boil his blood and get our drugs back. Charge him a recycling fee!”

~ Gang Leader