When a man loves an alpaca, sometimes they get together and do a very special kind of love with each other, like mommies and daddies do. Sometimes they have a special kind of children  together. Sometimes they live together for a long, long time and raise a family. In some states,  they can even get married.
Sometimes the mommy alpaca and the daddy person live together for a long time, and after a while, they decide they don't want to do that any more. When that happens, the mommy alpaca gets money every month from the daddy human for her and her freakish offspring, or daddy can go to jail. Normally the daddy doesn't want that, and will pay this money. This is called alpacamony.
- Massachusetts, Hell