Catastrophe

The catastrophe is a cross between a cat and an apostrophe. It has a nature that is a qualitative mixture of both – a little bit like an animal, and a little bit like a typographic character in the abstract. Above all, it has the quality of being catastrophic.

Transcending time and space in the manner that symbols in the abstract do, a catastrophe can appear anywhere, in any number of places; it can stay in wide circulation for a very long time, possibly lingering on forever in at least some place. But like an animal, it is driven by a nature that includes things like feeding and growing and reproducing; and like a cat in particular, it likes to hunt, and it may even meow, or do something analogous to that.

Much like an apostrophe, a catastrophe can mark a contraction, or shortening of something – an abrupt end, something coming to a close earlier than it otherwise would. Also like an apostrophe, it can mark the beginning of something as well as the end of something – that in-between standing out as different than that outside. Unlike quotes, the things inside may not be very well-preserved for posterity. Much like quotes, however, they may be pointed to often, referred to and viewed as poignant and interesting in all manner of contexts.

Avoiding catastrophes

Avoidance of catastrophes is similar, but not identical, to disaster prevention. (For the latter, it is better to read a Disaster Guide. A key point is that disaster is short for "dizzy aster", meaning "dizzy star", and that the dizziness and ditziness of the most famous is often strongly correlated with it.) Catastrophes are usually related to the crux of the matter, whatever it is, and on closer examination the matter at hand is often in large part composed of biscuits.

While the nature of the apostrophe is difficult to isolate in the typical catastrophe, it is sometimes possible to explore how that of the cat enters, and at times the study of the role of the cat reveals that of the apostrophe. Confusion of cats with other things, from cacti to hats to biscuits, can at times lead to, be part of, or follow from catastrophe. (Insofar as such confusion involves any dizziness, it may also be related to disaster.) For example, while it is commonly believed to be safe to dip biscuits into coffee, dipping cats into coffee is generally understood to be risky. There are hidden risks associated with the former, and when both are done, catastrophes become more likely, suggesting some relation between the biscuit and the apostrophe.

The role of biscuits (whether the biscuits are known or unknown) in ongoing or impending catastrophes points the way to a strategy for minimizing the latter. Whatever the things you're concerned with are, by making sure that it all goes to the dogs, you get rid of the biscuits, and thereby also the catastrophes tied to them.