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Garglefluff the nose!”

~ A sage on how to attain sanity

“The gargling! Aieee! THE GARGLING!!!

For good and ill, gargling – particularly the gargling of fluff – plays a significant part in the flow of energy throughout all of existence. Some gargle radiates outward, and some inward; those of a positive orientation thus disperse fluff, resulting in great creativity[1], while selfish bastards gargle the fluff into themselves, sapping the rest of the Universe of its power.

Many are the other things that can be gargled; for example, many religious schools advocate the gargling of nose. This is counterproductive, as doing so will render you full of nose[2]. And being full of nose is not a particularly good idea, nose being very noisy, drowning out signals of fluff (including even the sacred fractal chair broadcasts!) worse than even a thousand passes of lossy cheese integration ever would!


  1. In addition, such gargling of fluff will bring about a tremendously fresh breath. This stands in stark contrast to the gargling of cheese, which results in the worst.
  2. This is due in part to the nosefill instruction specified by the FLUFFIX Standard according to which the universe is implemented.