Why isn't this article featured?

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Please tell me? It's really unfair! I sat here and wrote this article, for God's sake! I quit my job just to work on getting this article featured. So why isn't it featured?

I quit my job to write this article[edit | edit source]

It's true! I walked right into my boss's office and told him I'm quitting my job as the executive manager of a 500,000-dollar-a-year job to do some very important work on my favourite site, and he just laughed at me and told me to get out of his office and quit wasting his time. I marched right outta there - and then had to return for my car keys - and them marched right out again! And when I got home, I wrote the hell out of this article.

After I chekd it wit hmy spelcheker, I submitted it and waited for it to be featured - but it's not featured! Why why why?!

You're racist[edit | edit source]

You know what I think? I think you're racist. You're being racist against my people because I'm better at writing articles than you are. Well, here's a newsflash for you - I DON'T CARE! You suck! I'll tell you what I'm gonna do... I'm gonna march right outta here and never come back!

Oops, forgot my car keys.

I'm sorry!![edit | edit source]

I'm so sorry I said all of that! I love you, Illogicopedia! Pleeeease feature my article! I need the money?

...What do you mean there's no money? Oh right, now you tell me. Up yours then.