This article

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Yes, this one! The one you are reading right now! In front of you on the screen! The screen you spat all over laughing at the sanity page. On the funniest site in the world. Funnier than the Onion, Uncyclopedia and the CBeebies site all rolled into one big fat Cuban cigar.

The cigar you obtained from that dodgy guy down the road. You know, him with the gammy eye. Him who once killed a cat with a pellet gun. That cat your neighbour owned and wants the guy evicted for it, but the police don't care.

What was I on about again?

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