Darth Vader

Darth Vader
Affilatration	The Sith, Dancing With The Stars, Former Jedi, Costco Member
Life Span	1977-3006
Catch Phrases	I will destroy your planet. Luke, I am your f***er. You F***er. You fucken cum-shit chew fucker. I'm gonna pound my dirt-dry gauntleted fist straight up your dingle-berry infested ass and crunch until you crap vomit.

Darth Vader, formerly known as Anakin Skyrunner, was a famous Sith lord. After an incident involving a lightsaber and lava, Darth Vader lost all his limbs and got badly burned. He was left for dead by his cat Obi-When Did I Ask Kenoob.

When Emperor Palpatine found him, he was rushed to The Hospital For The Weak And Foolish. There, he underwent carbon fiber surgery which had no lasting affect. Palpatine rushed him back and ordered the mentally ill doctor to operate on his friend. The operation took five minutes. When Darth Vader walked out of that ER, he was a new man....wearing a shiny black suit!

Shortly after this Darth Vader made the cut for Dancing With The Stars. Although, his partner was an obese Japanese tourist, they won the gold! In his later years, Lord Vader tried to rebuild the troubled relationship with his son, Luke, which ended up with Darth Vader's death after Luke forced him to get a Platinum Costco Membership and eat 16 rubber tires.

See also

• Darth Marlon Brando
• Star Wars