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I love dodos!

I just love love love love love love those roly poly roundy moundy smurfy wurfy furry winged beach balls!

And I just love love love love love love that nifty wifty nicky picky Wikipedia!

And I just LOVE the Wikipedia article on Dodos, it just -- it's so -- it -- oh -- umm -- I -- wow -- gggggleppth -- Ooops!

Just a moment while I clean up a bit...

Ok, I'm back.

But I hate hate hate HATE HATE grammar.

I mean, er, whoops, I mean I hate grammar errors.

But when I was reading the Wiki page on Dodos again today, you know, like I do most days, I saw -- oh -- oh no -- I saw -- a mistake. An error.

A ... a ... a ... grammar error.

And I can't stand it.

But I hate hate hate hate hate hate fixing grammar errors in Wikipedia articles because I always get banned afterwards. (It's a wonderful wonderful wonderful 'pede but boy are they mean over there.)

So I got clever this time, and I wrote a program to fix it! And it's a really nifty spifty wonderful artificially intelligent program and it fixes every error anywhere if you let it! And I wrote it in Pearl which is just like Teco only harder to read! And better! Unless if you need to escape. And it's almost as easy to debug a Pearl program as a Teco program, too! (Betcha didn't know Pearl was named to honor Janis, did you? See, that's why, "Pearl", you know, and here I bet you thought it was named for a bunch of knitting mistakes, but it's not.)

Oh I just re-read that last bit I wrote and I think maybe nobody younger than Methuselah will get any of the jokes but maybe they'll think it's funny anyway, I hope. Do you?

So I ran my nifty wifty grammar-n-stuff fixer on Wikipedia's Dodo page and it fixed it up, fixed everything, made it perfecter than perfect, and I was just about to put it up in place of the old broken Wikipedia article on dodos when Igor came and and said I had to stop. Time to get back in your cage, he said. Well poo on you, Igor, you're no fun.

But now I'm out again, and oh no oh no oh no, I can't find the page, I can't find Wikipedia, I had the URL here somewhere but now I've lost it. So I can't fix their article on dodos. And I can't read it, either, ever again, oh no! But at least I have the new, wonderful, perfected version.

I'll put it here.

Ok, here it is, just exactly like the Wikipedia text, but only it's been totally fixed up and made perfect so there aren't any mistakes any more:

Dodo[edit | edit source]

Dodo is a flying bird found in the eastern Indian Ocean from Madagascar to Mauritius. The hermit Rodriguez remained a family member of the monastery. Partridges were ruffled as a family of pigeons and birds, including pigeons. The marine expert is Nicobar pigeon. The white bird is believed to have been found on an island near Van Van, but not because there are local pictures of the bird and there are no birds.

Dodo was mentioned in 1599, explained the Dodo Roelant Savery was limited distribution across the British Museum of the size of the ancestors of the large terrestrial birds, 1 metre (3.3 feet) tall, and the word Dodo used as the Dodo painting, and the killing animals as well as Cygnus cucullatus, in December 2005 in print in a 95% confidence interval of old descriptions after they place of these birds in October 1866, Clark explained his 1634 by Juan Eusebio Nieremberg in comparison. The higher weight, and the Portuguese never exceeded 50 people in Prague. This crew of Isaac Johannes Lamotius in reference to support the clade. The fact that the head at least eleven transported abroad Painting of food resources. At first subfossil remains, so 17th century Dutch Expedition to Indonesia, led some leg bones found during cool seasons, but very good meat.

But finding an erroneous conjecture based on ripe fruits and the Broad-billed Pigeon

What? Wait! No!! It's not cage time yet! Go away, Igor!

I only just started typing in the new perfect text!

Oh help! Oh bother!

  1. Dodo seems to have grown up rather a lot since that picture was taken.