IDGAS
ID Gas is a petroleum spirit used by the United States's vee-hickle driving population. Popular amongst taxi drivers who like to smoke fifty a day and have a slight flatulence problem, it is slowly finding popularity in the Western World and Kerguelen.
Effect on the environment[edit | edit source]
A pollutant, ID Gas has pungent aroma a bit like haddock and butter, only with a tinge of sweaty feet. Thus it is lethal to small animals and Bob Geldof, but not Bono, for he has special powers that only he knows the secret of. He shall take them to his deathbed, at which point people will cease to care as the gas situation will be far past salvageable.
We're all gonna die![edit | edit source]
Don't look at me. Blame the penguins. And the cows. And Bono.
On a more serious note, global warming cannot be stopped, not by a tank, a herd of vicious buffalo or cigarette lighter. ID Gas, however, is preventable, but requires not actually eating, drinking or sleeping for long periods. That's why hippies are so spaced out and cranky, don't you know.
Life's an Ocean[edit | edit source]
“Too much commotion. Not enough emotion.”
Well, I was going to complete this sentence[edit | edit source]
...but I realised I really didn't GAS.
There is no fart joke in the above sentence.