Jimbo vs. Roberto
Jimbo stepped out into the evening. It was cool, but just warm enough to go without a cardigan, the kind of pleasant night you wouldn't ever see in a slasher movie, because it's always raining and thundering and lightning and such. Like I said, climactic conditions were nothing like that so Jimbo couldn't ever predict the events of that fateful evening, not even in his worst nightmares (which probably involve Illogicopedia as non-facts are scarier even than monsters to Jimbo).
As Jimbo passed a low wall, he felt something vibrate in his pants pocket. It was his iPhone alerting him of yet another revision to his Wikipedia page, which would happen on a regular basis and normally be worth ignoring. On this occasion, however, he decided to read the edit immediately. "It's such a nice night, I could sit here and add facts to Wikipedia until dawn," he mumbled to nobody in particular as he perched upon the wall. Unfortunately for our young(ish) hero, he wouldn't even make it past 12am.
Jimbo's cheery expression began to subside as the exact nature of this revision dawned upon him.
- Well okay, old