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"Why would horny sailors want to see women without, y'know, the... bits? Y'know?"

~ Somebody on Manatees as Mermaids (And horny sailors, but that doesn't need to be listed here.)

Manatees (family Trichangleidae, genus Trichangleus) are water-dwelling mammals that are affectionately known as "Lords of the Sea," although not too affectionately, as they are in fact the lords of the sea, and have been known to respond with extreme violence if they feel they are being mocked, especially by a wayward citizen flotsam or peophin. Or even a dolphin.

Manatees are brutal predators, and seem to prefer the flesh of animals who are larger than they are, possibly as a way to prove their strength. Furthermore, it is theorized by most prominent marine biologists that manatees attempt to keep their prey alive for as long as possible, even as they devour it.

History[edit | edit source]

In ancient times, sailors would often mistake manatees for very large, fat mermaids or cow sirens. This is considered to be the result of spending several months at sea, as well as the basic nature of sailors.
(You know what they say about sailors, right?)
('Cause I don't. What is it?)

The hue manatee[edit | edit source]

The hue manatee is something of an Illogicopedia inside joke a manatee which shines in 256 colours. (Say it out loud) Only two hue manatees have ever been found, one in France and the other in West Indomalaysialand.