Oily Steve

Once upon a time there was an ostrich named Oily Steve who could drive. In fact it drove a minivan with no driver's seat. How else are you going to get a big ass bird into a car?

Anyway, it was driving to school one day. Yes, it went to school. It needed a special desk to help it lay eggs whilst it learned. But on this particular day, it was very late for school because no one, not even ostriches like getting up early in the morning. So it was trying to find a place to put its stupid minivan, but there was no parking. It drove around and around the campus looking for a parking space, but he couldn't find any. There were some that were open. In fact, there were entire parking lots with free spaces, but they all said "not for ostriches" on the spaces.

Oily Steve was really upset. If he didn't get to class, then how would he turn in his homework? He finally said, "feck it", parked sideways across 4 handicapped spaces and ran to class.

When he got to class, he was a little pissed off because Sonic the Hedgehog was sitting in his seat, and we all know that hedgehogs are way smaller than ostriches. I’m not sure if they lay eggs or not, but they certainly don’t need a large egg-laying hole thing in a chair as big as an ostrich needs. The idiot in charge of the class talked on and on and on until oily-Steve laid an egg it was so boring.

Then it was time to turn in his homework, but Steve he realized that he can't type or write or hardly think for that matter, so there was no way he could have done his homework anyway. He was given a massive F minus, and told to go home by the teacher. To make things worse, when he went to find his minivan, parking services had given him not a ticket, not a boot, not even towing it, but set a car bomb under the car. Oily Steve tried to start his car after failing school and was blown into chicken wings.

The moral of this story?

I'm not sure.