Onion
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“Yuhm, an uhnyin.”
Onions may be stupid, but they aren't nowhere near not as stupid as Earth Day or Early Morning Television.
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On ion's there is microscopic dust. These are said to have been made from sub-atoms, a revolutionary particle yet to be discovered, but we all know it's just play-dough. The moon landing was made in a Hollywood basement!
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Onions make people cry and taste nasty plain but Funions are pretty good...