Ooh 'eck

“Oh no Keith, looks like someone's goin' prematurely greyyy... that's gonna hurt with the ladiessss”

~ JD on (the guy from Scrubs) on his arch nemesis Keith who later ends up as Elliot's boyfriend, OMG PLOT TWIST

Ooh 'eck, I do say. It's time for another article. How lucky you are... I do spoil you, I do. I keep treating you to these amazing articles because I'm so generous. Worship me. N0w.

N E way, it's time for me to write an article, so I think I'll do just that. After a healthy breakfast of toast, cereal and this amazing new product which my close friend told me about! It's chocolate but with only 99.95% of the fat in regular chocolate! And it's only £19.95 per bar! Isn't that amazing! It sure is. Can I have my money now?

Pssssssst... have I told you that I think sheds are useful?

It's true you know. I store my slaves in a shed. I should write an article about slaves in a shed. In fact, I will, after I write this one. Because that would be awesome. Anyway, time for a new title so my article looks pretty, and not all dis-organised. One of those slightly smaller titles where I have to press equals three times.

OLOLOLOL

I should get my slaves in a shed to write this for me. They know more than I do. But I can't let them out of the shed, so I guess I'll get my dog to write this for me. But he has paws, not hands, so he can't... ugh, fine, I'll do it.

Another 3-equals title?! O.O

What should I write about!? Forget it, I'll just stop writing in mid sente