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Evil Communist Cows from Space Invasion[edit | edit source]
“Okay, So There Was This Man Who Was Siting On His Computer And He Said There Was Evil Communist Cows From Space Invasion.”
When the evil communist cows from space invaded Illogicopedia on Tomorrow, Chuck Norris and Big Boss forced Bob Saget to to stop making movies and start makng guns. The guns were crap and Vin Diesel could only kill Tinky Winky, the adopted son of Barney and Spongebob. Chuck Norris killed Spongebob and Barney with the guns, and Mr. T beat Elmo to death with his bling, but it wasn't enough to kill the cow aliens, so Chuck Norris had to resort to his evil stare to kill them all.
The Clancy Brown vs. Grue Conspiracy[edit | edit source]
Bob Saget's i-pod was transformed into a superbad autobot when Clancy Brown (also known as Kurganator or John Big Boss Danzinger, his pet grue, and Bob Saget huffed a kitten together. Therefore the awesome power of the three combined to make Super Saget Grue Boss Killer.
Super Saget cannot die unless he is beheaded by another super robot monster. This can only be done by Samuel L. Jackson, Chuck Norris, or Mr. T, for all the others have yet to increase their badass levels. Super Saget-Grue-Clancy Brown helped Samuel L. Jackson fight snakes, so this will never happen. He can also fly, kill people by staring at them, and smoke 2 joints while snorting cocaine in both nostrils and drink Red Bull all at the same time.
Fat Buck Insane[edit | edit source]
Saget McBobertson is known to be Fat Buck Crazy. After Kurgan and Samuel L. Jackson got into a world war over the privelege to huff an orange grue, they both tried to assassinate Super Saget, so he got BaT f*%k InsANE and changed his name to Super Bob Saget McBurgerking Hitler.
Super Saget McBurGerking Hitler[edit | edit source]
When Bob Saget Uber-Hitler arrived in Chicago , he arrived in a world very different from his own. There were no weak, defenseless little nation-states to conquer, no certain "chosen people of Israel" to pick on, no Catholics to burn, no gypsies to gas, all due to those "stupid" civil rights laws, according to Bob Saget.
Later (around 45,000,000 BC), he began to dabble in the witchcraft and he slowly became very depressed nd started cutting himself until he bled motor oil. Then, he saw a rich, old gypsy with an AK 47 who turned out to be his old immortal arch-enemy Tegas Bob (in case you didn't know that, it is "Bob Saget" backwards.) and he killed him with one punch. He then managed to go back in time to the 1940s in Europe and killed 6 million other poor schmucks who got in his way of world domination. After Bob Saget dropped the F-Bomb live on the wholesome kids show South Park, he was so disturbed by the heavy criticizm he his name to Super Saget Kitten Huffer Cheese Monkey McStupid Hitler Jr. through of the witness protection program, but that's not important right now... also because Barney the Dinosaur was absolutely batscheisse, up-the-creek and mad at him for eating him without permission. Afterwards, he reunited with Clancy Brown and the non-huffable kitten and they joined the Ryperian Party.
Ryperian Party[edit | edit source]
Super Bob Saget Hitler, Clancy Brown, and the Non-Huffable Kitten joined the Ryperian Party ,a party ruled by the almighty Kevin Bacon|Kevin "bow down before my almighty power lest i smite with my wrath of super impending doom, kneel or you shall be smoten I am now your ruler bow, bow, BOW I tell you i am your master!!!!!!!!" Bacon, despite having to eat five babies and poop them out alive (which he could do successfully with seven babies). In the first year of being a Ryperian Party Member, they completed the following:
- Got kicked out of a highschool gymnasium seventy-three times by a group of homosexual seniors
- Molested the Yeti of Nordonia Hills three times a week
- Got killed by allied Ryperian Party Members twice a week
- He shot an eighth grade science teacher in the face with shotgun
- Established the term "Mini-Jeff" to one of his allied Ryperian Party Members
- Kicked ass
- Transformed into a grue three times a month
- Made his teeth whiter than Michael Jackson's left eyeball
- Established Bob Saget Day, celebrated on December 25th
- Planted mines in the Ippolito Driveway
The Great Cheese Conquest[edit | edit source]
After Mr. Brown, Mr. Kitten, and Mr. Saget-Hitler joined the Ryperian Party, they met Bobert the Flying Cheese Monkey. The Non-Huffable Kitten then got gay with Bobert the Flying Cheese Monkey and they adopted twins. They were unhuffable flying cheese cats who breathed fire and could turn anything except for grues, Chuck Norris, and Solid Snake into cheese. The team joined forces with all of the other Ryperian Party members. The other members of the Ryperian Party are Gandalf the Grey, Gandalf the White, Monty Python and the Holy Grail's Black Knight, Benito Mussolini, the Blue Meanie, Cowboy Curtis, Jambi the Genie, Robocop, Terminator, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Lo Pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston, Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan. Together they defeated O.J. Simpson, Chuck Norris, Big Boss, and George W. Bush, so the world became ruled by the Ryperian Party. They made crap for brains dictators though and forced everybody to eat cheese.
Moldy Cheese[edit | edit source]
The first planet the Ryperians conquered was Pluto. The gay cheese-breathing monkeycat brothers mentioned above turned it into a moldy lump of feta cheese and forced Big Boss to eat the whole thing. Big Boss then choked to death with two bites left. Then they turned Big Boss's carcass into moldy cheese and Clancy Brown killed all of the mold with his 20 foot long ninja sword and turned Big Boss Cheese into a Cheese Kitten and all of the Ryperians took turns huffing it.
Organic Cheese[edit | edit source]
The Ryperians then recieved death threats from Strong Bad and then Strong Bad asploded their base. Clancy Brown, Super Robot Bob Saget Hitlerbot, Bobert the Flying Cheese Monkey, Clancy Brown's pet grue, and the non-huffable kitten were the only survivors. Gandalf the Grey, Gandalf the White, Monty Python and the Holy Grail's Black Knight, Benito Mussolini, the Blue Meanie, Cowboy Curtis, Jambi the Genie, Robocop, Terminator, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Lo Pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston, Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan all died in the blast. Bobert the Flying Cheese Monkey then made all of the surviving Ryperians become hippies and they turned Strong Bad into a chunk of organic cheese. Then they ate Organic Strong Bad Cheese and then the Ryperian Party disbanded forever. Then Bob Saget pooped on the gorilla monkeys of Non.