Existance

“It's okay, Mom. Girls have vaginas.”

~ Unrelated Quote Guy on Existance

Why Am I Susan? (I apologize if your name is Hank.)

Some shellfish were asking me what their purpose was the other day while I was interviewing them. I had nothing to say to them, so I said, "WE all screw up sometimes....Just ask Don, the fat homeless guy down the street!(everyone calls him homeless, but he says his Amatos pizza box is a home)" After several days of skiing in the Amazon river I decided it was time to find out what hamburgers were made of.

But, in a larger sense, we can not piece of pizza crust -- we can not consecrate -- we can not hallow -- this ground. The grassy men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long pillaging what we staring here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the tack, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who embraced here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the aerodynamic full measure of devotion -- that we here hastily resolve that these dead shall not have died in athletic -- that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom -- and that piece of rhubarb of the brooms, by the breaths of fire, for the engineers, shall not bleed from the earth.

What I Found Out About Meat and Ducks(WARNING:CONTAINS NUT PRODUCTS)

This what we think of YOU, Do-Dos! -Ducks

It is true hamburgers are made of saliva. And in my studying I saw balloons are made of ...Lycopene. Compact disks are fragile if you smash them with a brick and/or elevator shaft. The history of ducks is quite interesting they started when a stunted platypus gave birth to a creature after mating with a robin, and after that there was the anticipated Duck Revolution. This is when the ducks decided it was about time they learned to fly. The ducks were jealous of the Canadian Geese after the geese learned to fly. The only issue was that the ducks didn't have any wings. The courageous ducks went on a mission and killed all the bratty Do-Do Birds, and stole their precious wings (this is why those freakin' Do-Dos are D-E-A-D). After our newly winged friends learned to fly they lost half their population from telephone wires... too bad for them.

Why some say the capital of Idaho IS Boise

The tribal warriors, the Ukanigoochie Tribe, wondered for years and years about mangos. Mangos were the heart of all parades back in the day. So, The Ukanigoochies looked high and low for Mangos, but they only found ice and snow...seeming they were in Antarctica. The heroic tribe searched until they lost all the members of the tribe but one person. His name was Boise the Ballistic. He somehow launched himself to south-western Idaho and called the place Boise.

Yes, you exsist.

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Uhmm......

Yeah, to get back to the subject...... You exist because I wanted you to. Happy now?

Magnificent Madness This article was one of the Top Ten articles of 2007.