And...cooked giant rat meat.
The anchovies look like blue shrimp.
And thus, it begins.
Pizza History[edit | edit source]
People thought it would be a good idea to start collecting pizza crusts.[edit | edit source]
And I don't blame them. Crusts are quite the collector's item, as a renowned crust enthusiast once described:
This one came from a pizza, and this one came from a pizza, and this one came from a pizza. I also collect socks, but some of my cheesed socks might have depreciated in value. Feel free to pizza my socks as well. Jim Socks wouldn't disapprove.
My neighbour *hic* is the coolest. He doesn't eat pizza though. What a *hic* disappointment.
How to Make Pizza[edit | edit source]
- Get a flat piece of bread. At least that's what I think it is.
- Get some tomato sauce.
- Get an alarm clock and smash it with a hammer until it is broken up into several pieces.
- Mix the alarm clock pieces in with the sauce.
- Do the Macarena on top of the pizza barefoot.
- Cover it with goat hair and fold the bread up into a ball.
- Roll a taco over your face.
- Defecate onto the bread ball, then add those green slimy things. I mean, what they hell are they anyway?
- Poke it.
- Put the bread ball into the oven on 500 for 60 minutes.
- Take the bread ball out, sit on it, and sprinkle it with oregano and perhaps some sprinkles if you are bold.
- Eat the pizza without eating your hands in the process.
See also[edit | edit source]
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