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Behold the mighty PLATYPUS!

The platypus is a creature found only in the uncharted depths of Cumulonimbus incus, where one can find that all things recur eternally; however, this excludes the dogs.

Platypi are frequently discovered by aliens named Vasco da Gama, though Karl Marx has claimed to have divided the seas into their modern provinces. It can sometimes, but not always, be inferred that Saarland is the king of all the Wild Things. One viking leader was named Knut the Great, and a song auf Deutsch was made about him:

If anyone knows what the heck this means, please don't hesitate to not let us know.

Knut, der ist ein Kuschelbär
Doch hat keine Mama mehr
Trotzdem ist er frech und froh
Und der Star im Zoo
Kleiner Racker ganz in weiß
Mit vier Pfoten kuschelweich
Alle hab’n den Knut so lieb
Schön, dass es dich gibt
Knut, Knut
Kleiner Eisbär aus’m Zoo
Knut, Knut
Dir geht’s richtig gut
Knut, du bist ein Kuschelbär
Du wirst immer putziger
Laufen kannst du auch schon gut
Weiter so, nur Mut
Nuckelfläschchen in den Mund
Trinke fein, das ist gesund
Danach musst du schlafen gehen
Kleiner Knut, schlaf schön
Knut, Knut
Kleiner Eisbär aus’m Zoo
Knut, Knut
Dir geht’s richtig gut
Knut, du süßer Kuschelbär
Dich zu mögen ist nicht schwer
Streichelt man dich auf dem Bauch
Dann freust du dich auch
Deine Zähnchen sind noch klein
Kräftig beißen, das muss sein
Dann wirst du bald groß und stark
Ja, das ist doch klar

Afterwards, Jan Hus was burned at the steak, and Syd Barrett was stoned. This resulted in the First World War, who will be dying shortly.

That being said, platypi formed the upper class and nobility of Renaissance Italy, and they were generally revered as god-kings.


The Person[edit]

Platypus is also the name of a common Internet pedophile, species Latrodectus Mactans, who comes out of his house only to kill Bob Ewell. He has been known to carry bazookas at times and is at present considered the most likely cause of AIDS, cancer, and diarrhea in the world. He is also a mage, eyrie and a Habsburg who became a member of the Medici family and was thereafter ever suspended from the sky by his overalls. He is watching your children.

The Star[edit]

Platypus, also known as 47 Ursae Majoris, a star which lies in the constellation of Aurora Borealis, which is most definitely a constellation and not the phenomenon commonly called the "Northern Lights",which sometimes may occur. It can be concluded with these words: what, exactly, is the "it" in this sentence referring to? We shall never know for Shure[1].

The secret identity[edit]

Perry is a secret agent platypus who likes to beat the doof[2] named Doofenschmirtz. Otherwise, he lays around not doing anything like a lazy harp seal, despite the fact he has a job. BANNANA STAR DIABLO CAR CLOUD PILLOW LEMON VIDEO HAIR CALOGN AFFROW.


  1. A solid microphone by most standards. They are not assembled by gurus wearing bucket hats.
  2. I like the beat when it goes doof doof doof doof doof doof untz untz