IllogiBooks:A Guide to Trolls

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Trolls

  • ...shamelessly criticize how bad your drawings are, when they have never drawn anything themselves.
  • ...tell you to "GTFO"-- get the fuck off-- but if you do (close your account), they will still laugh at you and call you names.
  • ...will, when you have obviously won the argument, call you one of five names: "furfag," "fail," "gay," "n00b," or "loser," not knowing/caring that none of those names are in the least bit offensive.
  • ...use a kind of code talk using numbers called "Leetness" to call you names behind your back, not knowing/caring that everybody already knows it like the backs of their hands.
  • ...say that you deserve to be on Encyclopedia Dramatica, obviously forgetting that it was changed into "OhInternet" or whatever and that the mirror site is about as used as Nupedia.
  • ...pick out people to troll by seeing if they have pages on LurkMoarPedia the new ED, not knowing/caring that those same people get about 100 trolls a day, and take each new troll like a grain of sand.
  • ...use 4chan/ED in-jokes that have already been used 1,000 times before. And they love it.
  • ...say that anything relating to Sonic the Hedgehog is "horrible, effing horseshit," then go off and play Grand Theft Auto or watch My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
  • ...like mudkips.
  • ...are part of the Internet group called "Anonymous," but have only joined to hide the fact that they're actually the people I will describe in paragraph 14.
  • ...claim you're a coward when you block them, when the only real reason you blocked them is so you won't have to put up with their bullshit spamming up your inbox every day.
  • ...call their trolling "cool," and then call actually doing something with your life besides sitting on your arse all day "stupid."
  • ...will sometimes make other sockpuppet accounts just so they can have new ways of trolling people when they are blocked.
  • ...are, when you get down to it, fat 37-year-old men who don't have girlfriends and still live with their parents eating chicken strips while sitting around at the computer in their basement all day.
  • ...try to fart whoope something I got lazy
  • ...are the only reason I'm typing this right now.


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