IllogiNews:Boys only want love if it's torture

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White House Press Secretary Josh Earnest actually answered a question someone posed, which is more that can be said than about his predecessor, even if the question was arbitrary and pointless.

EARTH, Milky Way- A press release on October 27, 2014 has revealed one of the worst kept secrets in the history of humanity. When asked about the state of the human race on this day, White House Press Secretary Josh Earnest stated that: "When determining the viability of the human race, one has to consider the willingness of both sexes to procreate. If one sex has less of a willingness to procreate, then the population dwindles. In many Western nations, where the feminist movement is prominent, one realizes that the women are unwilling to put up with the chauvinistic attitudes of men. By noting that boys only want love if it's torture, the women have effectively bettered their condition at the expense of the re-population of the species." Earnest declined to comment on the sort of "torture" he was referring to in the release, and whether he "tortured" his wife. Sources indicate, however, that the only "torture" she received was from listening to Earle Doud's ‎Spiro T. Agnew Is A Riot.

Sociologists and psychologists have noted the recent trend, and encourage it due to the notion that people have equal rights and therefore should feel free to procreate at their leisure. One report said that this is going to eventually result in the population of the planet at far more reasonable rate than at present, but the report lacked any information about the booming population rate in developing nations. President Barack Obama, former President George W. Bush, Julius Caesar, and Ben Ghazi have also all refused to respond.

Leaving a vast blank space in the moral code of the world, these reports and studies have quite clearly stated the obvious without any solutions to the problem, which in effect, is what journalism is all about. Journalists simply note the aging population in developed nations, come up with an "explanation" like the constant desire for an intricate pursuit in relationships by men, and fail to do anything about said "problem."

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