The Magic Book
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In the town of Nowt, there was an urban legend about a magical book that gave you immortality and super powers. But, it only appeared on one particular day in the year.
This article is one of Illogicopedia's EPICs.
CHAPTER 1[edit | edit source]
April 1, 2008
A 14-year-old boy named Johnny had heard about the Magic Book legend in school. He was amazed that something like that could ever be true, so he decided not to believe it. Johnny went on through his school day, came home, went to sleep, and went to school the next day. Everyone had pretty much forgotten about the legend except one kid, Eric Crie, the scrawny nerdy kid that everyone picked on. Johnny got out of his car at the drop-off. Diiiing! The bell rang, Johnny was late again! He quickly hurried up the path leading to the doors. As Johnny was about to enter he tripped over his own shoelace. Slam! He hit his head on the path.
"Need help?" A voice said, as Johnny's face was smushed into the cement. Johnny looked up. It was Eric. "What do you want?" Johnny asked. "Ummm... Eric paused. "I was wondering if you needed help."
"Oh, um, wait. You're late, you're never late, you come here like a half hour early." "Exactly," Eric said. "I was waiting for you." Johnny slowly got up from the ground. "Waiting for me?" Johnny asked, a little creeped out. "Yes. I wanted to ask you something." "Um... OK. What do you want to ask me?" Eric fixed his glasses into position. "Would you like to help me find the magic book?"
Johnny burst out laughing. "What? Haha! Wow Eric, you'll believe anything you hear won't you?"
"Please Johnny I know its true!" "No! You're making me way late anyway!" Johnny started to walk away, when Eric grabbed him on the shoulder. "I've seen it before." Johnny turned around and looked at Eric. "Yeah I bet you did! Haha!" Johnny continued to walk away. "Johnny! Wait!" Johnny turned around again angry. "What?" Johnny asked. "I can give you all As in your classes," Eric said. "Oh yeah, how will you do that?" "My Grandmother is the principle." It sounded pretty good to Johnny since he was failing most of his classes, except P.E. "Ok," Johnny started, "We get this book, I get all As this semester, and that's it, right?" "Exactly." Eric said. "Alright," Johnny said. "I'm in."
CHAPTER 2[edit | edit source]
"Great," Eric said "Follow me." Eric and Johnny both walked away from the school and headed towards the street. "So you say you've seen it before, right?" Johnny said. "Where is it?" "Well, it's in the mountains." Eric replied. "Wait, so your telling me we have to climb Mt. Toumn, and you've done it before!?" Johnny exclaimed, as they walked across the street, staring at the tall mountains above the trees. "It wasn't easy let me tell you." They walked on to the sidewalk of another street and followed that for about 5 more minutes. They passed a convenience store along the way. "I'm thirsty... one sec." Johnny said "I'm gonna grab a drink." "OK, I'll wait." Eric said. Johnny ran into the store. He walked to the back where the fridges were and grabbed a bottle of red Gatorade. He walked back to the front of the store and put the Gatorade on the counter. He grabbed a Snickers bar from in front of the counter and put that up as well. He paid with his lunch money for school and walked to the door. "Wait kid." The cashier said. He was a heavy man with a black shirt and jeans on He had a big nose and a stubble.
Johnny turned and looked at the man. "Yeah?" He said confused. "Shouldn't you be in school?" The cashier asked him. "Uh...um..." Johnny wasn't prepared to say an excuse, and he couldn't say I lost it, or my dog ate it, or I didn't get it like he usually did. "Me and this kid...are going... to Mt. Toumn..." Johnny was disappointed in himself for not coming up with an excuse. "Oh, what are you gonna do up there?" The man asked. "Were looking for a book." Johnny replied.
"Haha!" The man exclaimed. "Not that magic book?" "Uh..." Johnny stuttered. "That's the one, heh." He tried to fake a laugh with the man but it didn't sound very convincing. "You know there's a reason why it only appears on April first! Haha!" The man laughed. Johnny opened the door and left. An old April Fools joke Johnny assumed, but it was for his grades, so he had to keep moving. He saw Eric sitting on the sidewalk. He walked over to him.
CHAPTER 3[edit | edit source]
"Hey Eric," Johnny asked. "Is this book some kind of joke or something?" Eric turned to him startled. "No, no, I've seen it before." Johnny didn't believe him. "Yeah, yeah, yeah, you already said that. Now tell the truth, are you screwing with me and wasting my time? Also, are you even sure you can get me all A's?" "Well..." Eric wasn't sure what to say. "I haven't really SEEN it. But I strongly believe it's there." "I bet you do, Eric." Johnny was starting to forget about his grades and not go through with this.
"I'm going." "Where? School started 45 minutes ago, and you can't be late one more day." Eric asked. Johnny thought. Eric had a point but he wasn't sure. Go through all the trouble trying to find something that could not even be there, or get in trouble at school, and at home. And when Johnny's Mom tells his Dad... "Fine, I'll keep going. And if your lying than..." Johnny tried to think of what to say. "Then... Fine whatever, how much trouble could it possibly be?" Eric smiled.
"No trouble at all." They continued down the road, through intersections, and once in a while they'd cut through someones lawn. After about an hour they came to a dead end, leading to the woods. "Please tell me we don't have to go through here." Johnny said, a little nervous. "Why, are you scared?" Eric asked. "Oh really funny Eric. That's coming from the kid who cried when he got peanut butter stuck on the roof of his mouth." Eric stopped smiling. It was true though. He did cry when he got peanut butter stuck on the roof of his mouth a couple weeks ago. They both stepped into the thicket of dead trees, twigs, and moss. They walked around trees over logs and rocks. They then reached a clearing leading to a vast grassland, just before the mountains. The only thing that was stopping them was a little extraordinary. "E-Eric... Am I dreaming?" Johnny was shaking like a vibrator.
"Yup. Don't worry he won't hurt you." Eric replied. "That's not the p-point. Is that r-r-real?" "Of course it is, Johnny" "So you're saying that thing is real?" "Yup." If you're wondering what your staring at then I'll tell you. It was about the size of an average couch in length, about a big-screen television in height. It was hairy and had fangs. I think you can guess by now... It was a giant spider. "L-let's go, Eric n-n-now!" "Hello, friend." Eric said. Johnny assumed that the spider was sleeping because of the loud snoring. The spider grunted and looked at them with all eight eyes. The spider focused on Eric.
"Oh, The Small One has returned, has he not?" The spider's voice was deep, slow and faded out. "Yes, sir." Eric replied. "Do you wish to pass?" The spider asked. "Yes we do." Eric replied once again. Johnny was awestruck by the talking spider. He kept opening and closing his eyes assuming he was in a dream. But every time he was hoping to to end up in his bed at home, he was right back in the woods, with Eric and a giant talking spider. If there was a talking spider, maybe the book may be real after all. The spider moved out of the way. The thick and monstrous web carrying him. He ripped a whole in his web big enough to fit Eric and Johnny through.
"Thank you." Eric said. "Have fun... haha!" The spider laughed. The laugh hurt Johnny's ears it was so loud. They both stepped through the hole into the grassland.
CHAPTER 4[edit | edit source]
It was actually very nice. Soft, short grass. A nice breeze and not a tree in sight. Well, unless you turned around. Looking up into the vast mountains you can see a waterfall and a small cave behind it. They continued on. About 10 minutes up, they reached a path going up into the mountains. As they walked up the about a half of a mile path the talked a little.
"Hey Eric, do you remember the April fools joke I pulled on you last year?" Johnny asked. Eric smiled. "You mean when you told me that there was a magical fairy on the roof and when I went up there I got suspended?" "Ha! It still makes me chuckle." "Very humiliating." Eric said. "I'll never forgive you for that." They continued to walk up the path. Johnny's feet started to hurt. "Hey Eric can we stop here and sit for a sec?" "No," Eric replied. "We must keep going, were almost there." Johnny scowled. He continued to walk up the path, slowly. After about 35 more minutes they reached the top of the path. They were right behind the waterfall. The loud sound of the water crashing down in front of them. "WE HAVE TO GO IN THIS CAVE!" Eric screamed. "WHAT? YOU"RE READY TO SHAVE?" "NO GO IN THIS CAVE!" "GO IN THIS GRAVE?" "Ugh.." Eric walked into the cave. "OH CAVE!" Johnny screamed. He followed. "I can't see anything." Johnny said. "Ow!" Johnny said.
"What happened?" Eric asked. "I think I bumped into a wall." Eric grabbed him. "Over here." "How do you know where to go?" Johnny asked. "I have these night vision goggles on." Eric replied. "Night vision goggles? Since when did you get those? Give me a pair also." "I only brought one pair, and I got them from home." Johnny thought that was weird but oh well. Eric dragged Johnny through the cave dragging him left and right and up and down and everywhere. Eric stopped. "What?" Johnny asked. "Were here." Eric replied. Eric touched a stone and and the back wall of the cave slowly opened. Johnny looked at it. "Wow cool door." He said. Now he could see in front of him. And all he saw was an altar with a brown, dusty, and ripped book. "Oh my god..." Johnny said. "It's true... it's actually true." "I told ya." Eric said. "Want to open it?" Eric asked. Johnny nodded. He grabbed the book and opened it.
CHAPTER 5[edit | edit source]
Johnny looked at the first page. He read:
- You've found the magic book. Read the next page, and you will become supernatural. :You will be come stronger than anyone you will ever meet.
- One more thing: are you sure you want this? There is no going back
Johnny slowly turned the next page. He read the big, fat text. He turned behind him, Eric was gone.
The text read
- APRIL FOOLS
Read the sequel here!