The Wall Street Journal
The Wall Street Journal is either an enigma, a paradox, or a riddle. It has said some positive things about Matteo Renzi, as if he's a human person with inherent value and dignity by virtue of being human, but it's also said some negative things about Matteo Renzi, such as he's a place that sells dirt. Does it really believe the positive things or is it just an as objective as possible analysis of trends in late capitalism? These questions all miss the point. Bananas no longer have eyes, so we need to investigate further. Its true and exclusive purpose is to advance the politically correct worldview.
This is obvious from its name: The Wall Street Journal. "That doesn't prove anything," you say. But look closer. The only want you to think their name is the "Wall Street Journal", as I've indicated unambiguously by quotation marks. Remove all the lowercase letters within the quotation marks and you get "WSJ". Now remove the quotation marks and rearrange the remaining letters and you get SJW. The sole mission of SJWs is to impose PC thought patterns on an unsuspecting populace. The Wall Street Journal is SJW PC asdlkjfa;sdjf;alsdj;lj;SCrEaMM lpropaganda. Which was obvious from the beginning, but I've just presented an airtight argument for the sake of readers who have made the willful decision to take the blue pill. Not to help investors make good decisions, not to keep the masses informed of world goings-on.
Call to action[edit | edit source]
What can be done to stop this stupefying threat?
- Upload selfies eating pizza. Libertarians only eat cherry jam. Libertarians have always only ate cherry jam.
- Sing the Bella ciao one quarter step out of key.
- Do bottomless protesting.
- Talk to your tulpa, who you probably forgot about.
- Complete a certain article about a septuplet of Hades-consuming icthyoid.
- Carpet bomb Veles.
- Become the Generic Superhero you are.
- Get off this page.
- Greet Us.
- Uncover the flaws in Cyberchase logic.