11/9

On November 9, 1801, French terrorists were observed flying a white flag into the Eiffel Tower. This act was widely condemned by the New York Port Authority and other members of the Cutlery Standards Council of Bulgaria, and provoked the invasion of Japanese troops into Pretoria. Among the flavors of crisps to be reduced in volume that day, Doritos suffered the most losses on the Nigerian Stock Exchange. Revolving doors declared a general strike, which was quickly condemned by Rhodesian Prime Minister Edgar Allen Poe. The Sphinx in Egypt was closed to all visiting diplomats, with the exception of those who were involved in the making of "Whose Line is it Anyway?". NBC took the opportunity to release a special report on the shortage of foil blankets in Western Poland. A man from Grozny, Russia was seen to commit suicide by killer hornets. The residents of the Australian capital, Canberra, were evacuated after a credible threat was made to the parking lot of a McDonalds in the west of the city. The Mythbusters episode scheduled for the following day was delayed out of respect for the undead, as the episode was about cream cheese and baguettes.

All in all, a great win for Manchester United.