Advertising Epilepsy

IT'S HERE! THE NEWLY AWAITED PRODUCT IS FINALLY OUT! INTRODUCING....EPILEPSY!

WITH SO MANY COLORS, AND RANDOM FLASHES EVERY FEW SECONDS, IT'S A PRODUCT YOU DON'T WANNA MISS!!! IN FACT, UNLESS YOU'RE A BLIND OLD LADY THERE'S NO WAY YOU WILL MISS IT!!

Because even if you did try to miss it, we'd still deliver it to your doorstep...unless you don't have a door.

ENJOY THE PAINS COMFORTS OF EPILEPSY IN YOUR OWN HOME!!!!!!

“I tried this product, and the next thing you know, I had epilepsy!”

~ Some guy

“Don't try this product. It killed my dog. Somehow.”

~ Some other guy with a dog

THAT'S WHAT PEOPLE SAID AFTER THEY TRIED OUR HORRIBLE WONDERFUL PRODUCT!

Product does not cause death. Batteries not included. Colors may vary.

“What do you mean "Product does not cause death?"...IT KILLED MY DOG!”

~ That guy with that dog

Yeah, well read the fine print.

Product does actually cause death, but you're not supposed to know that.

Customer Testimonials

• Epilepsy changed my life. For the worse. Get out of here, you damn cat! —rms talk 02:06, 14 Jumbly 2009 (UTC)
• It's a such a sham... Wow! Wait, not a shamwow? Ah, same logic applies anyway.--Bladepaw, ruler of all that is my head! 14:06, 16 Jeremy 2010 (UTC)
• I got epilepsy and sued the Illogicorp for billions! I could retire instantly at the age of 22. -- Hindleyak  Converse • ?blog • Click here! 21:42, 16 Jeremy 2010 (UTC)
• I saw this add once and though OH man that's too good to be true! I tried it out and WOW! It works for real! It can get any stain out of any carpet, try for yourself! I go nowhere without my Epilepsy Carpet Cleaner!--|Fonchezzz| Quacking| 17:06, 5 Serpeniver 2010 (UTC)
• Epirepu-siu no guto! No guto! Aiii! --Galanoth 15:12, 8 Serpeniver 2010 (UTC)
• AARGGHH, weird colours, weird colours! Wait, what were we talking about?-- (Talk) (Contributions) 06:42, 9 Novelniver 2010 (UTC)

This article is illogical enough to have made it onto the front page. View more featured articles   •   Vote for new featured articles