FOX News

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“Fair n' Balanced. Chalkboard powah!”

FOX News is a news source projected in the sky all over the world by a 1 inch projector powered by fairy dust created by The Republicans in 19996. It talks all about the news you might need to know recieved by their elves with their mind reading powers. It is fair and balanced by their magical weight changer, not too heavy, not too light.

History[edit | edit source]

It was started in 19996 by Johnny Cash and Dr. Phil. It featured the news on that day about the Pokemon stampede in Georgia. It then became popular, reaching 1.47 viewers a year, 3/2 of the world's total population. Cash and Phil then decided to hire a whole bunch or Santa's elves to recieve news by mind reading and world scanning powers, technology not yet used by CNN or MSNBC.


Post 23455535th Century[edit | edit source]

FOX News has moved from television to a 1 inch projector reaching every ounce of sky on Earth. Cash may be gone, but Phil is the CEO and Chairman, running it and giving out free chairs to hobos.

Content[edit | edit source]

FOX News may have every piece of info on news, but broadcasts only stuff on the USA. Most people in other countries don't look at the sky.

The Future[edit | edit source]

FOX News may go all over the universe with a 1 cm projector, bigger than their old one.

True Story[edit | edit source]

In an alternate timeline, FOX News is run by an angry mob of 17-legged foxes wearing purple sweaters and red bandannas.