IllogiNews:If I buy frozen chupacabra, will my dinner guests notice

This article is part of IllogiNews, your sauce for chips and sausages.

There is always the risk your frozen chupacabra may come out like this.

"Non", says renowned chef Paul Prudhomme, who does not exist as of this writing. A NASCAR-type musical satire of Faust would provide adequate cover to pass frozen off as fresh. And of course, the chef also advises, serve with lots of ketchup. After all, Martin Heidegger wasn't built in a day.

“Oh, I always buy fresh! I like to butcher them myself... rip their throats out with my teeth.”

~ Katy Perry on how she prepares chupacabra

After deep frying, serve with ranch dressing and pig ears. For Viennese style, coat with powdered sugar, chocolate chips and baby otters.

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