Her birth and childhood[edit | edit source]
Katy was born in the small town of Essex, Texas, at the age of 23. Her father worked as a Discordian reverend, and her mother (who also happens to be a tarsier) made money by selling candy to diabetics.
Her job[edit | edit source]
Katy is currently employed as a boob model, a job that allows her to make lots and lots of money. She is known world-wide for her perfectly plump boobs and her flawless nipples.
Her husband[edit | edit source]
Katy is currently married to Bigfoot.
Music career[edit | edit source]
Katy also has a musical career. Some people like her music, some people don't. But everyone loves her gigantic milk jugs.
Discography[edit | edit source]
Illogical nonfacts[edit | edit source]
- Katy Perry rhymes with Smelly Berry.
- Katy Perry can shoot whip cream out of her nipples.
- Katy Perry can melt your popsicle.
- Katy Perry's kisses taste like Mountain Dew and Skittles.