Those of you foreign enough to have actually read my title and clicked the link will now be hex-pecting (heh, see what I did there?) a long and boring article to go with it. Instead, I have opted to fill this space with a slightly edited extract from the popular children's porno-mag, Harry Potter and the Magician of an Alakazam Good time.
Please stand for the entry of this text.
Curtains open, Harry is jerking off to a statue of himself and his half-brother-turned-sex-slave Ron is sodomizing the idealisms of Christianity.
- Harry: Hey, Ron, blarble-garf?
- Ron: Your speech seems to have disintegrated into meaningless pigeon excrement.
- Harry: Oh yes, so it has, my bliss-take, I forgot to speak Engrish.
- Ronald: That's perfectly allmight, my slightly fat elder-crab.
- Harry: Are you implying that I have too many fingers?
- Rofl: That is none of our business.
Enter Steven Hawking, the female of the threesome, filling in for Hermionie who blew up
- Harry: Oh my, what a startling plot twist!
- Rob: Indeed, my hairy-dairy counterpart.
- Mr Blobby: Bleep bleep bloop blop.
- Harry: That information is incorrect, you inspirational son of an A4 sheet of verbal diarrhoea!
- Rod: Indupidably!
- Harry: My Harry sense is tingling, either trouble is close by or I have an erection.
Dumblewhore apparates in their room naked, gives a twirl, and disappears back to his brothel.