Don't eat KFC on Jupiter

"Don't eat KFC on Jupiter" is good advice. Eating KFC on Jupiter is never a good idea.

Why the Spaghetti Not?

Don't say words like "rimming" and "Spaghetti" to me. The reason why you should not eat KFC on Jupiter is because eating KFC on Jupiter has historically been linked to death, eternal damnation and jaywalking.

Give me Examples

Fine.

December 18, 1050 BCE

The first instance. President Richard Nixon ate KFC on Jupiter. He considered it a marvellous new thing, and hoped it would become an American tradition. That very night he died for no apparent reason.

Monuary 26, 656 CE

Now after Richard Nixon died like that, it became a social taboo to eat KFC on Jupiter. No one did it for 1706 years. But along came a man who scoffed at social convention. His name was Sigmund Freud. He was convinced that the social forbiddance of eating KFC on Jupiter was merely an irrational fear, and that if one person ate KFC on Jupiter without dying, the public would cease to fear it. He was wrong, of course. Exactly 11 hours, 7 minutes and 60 seconds after eating KFC on Jupiter, Sigmund Freud fell dead.

Toctober 94, (i•900)+44% UCE_{(uncommon era)}

On this very date of irrational nature, the infamous highway robber Señor Von Dickbutt the Third ate KFC on Jupiter. Instantly he was afflicted with millions of diseases, from his head to his penis. It was so horrific that your mom banned eating KFC on Jupiter in this country, but that was INFINITY+133 years ago, so I have to tell you.

Conclusion

DON'T EAT KFC ON JUPITER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DON'T DON'T DON'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OR ELSE YOU WILL DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A A A A A A A A A A A A A A E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I O O O O O O O O O O O O O O O O O U U U U U U U U U U U U U U U U U U U U Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y

See Also

• Don't
• Eat
• KFC
• On
• Jupiter