Slipping My Pickle In
“Why does this sound so erotic?”
MY PICKLE PLAN
Something pornographicToo risky Something in FrenchCan't speak French Something well thought out and hilariousA nice thought
- Dinosaurs? YES
A story all about how my life got flip-turned upside downProbably not a good idea Steal other people's entries and change all the names to JonDidn't work last time Something really oldschool and absurdNaw Translate The Da Vinci Code into Klingon and swap all the O's for I'sTempting, but I don't have enough time, dammit!
- Some generic story BINGO
Lexi Sexhole, a gun-toting stripper with boobs for a faceInappropriate my arse. Seargent Sillybollocks, a lovable African desbotWhy did no one like this? Paedo PeteI thought every story needed a friendly paedophile. Seppy thought not.
- Max HeroMuscle, a painfully cliched protagonist
- Helpless Damsel, because no story is complete without overt gender stereotyping
- Dimitri 'Predictably evil' Kozlovich, our Russian heavily scarred one-eyed mustache sporting villain
- Faceless extras, for space filling and cool fight scenes
- Rex, Max's trusty dinosaur
- Max HeroMuscle is just your average everyday office worker with a body that looks like it was carved out of marble by very stylish angels and an unexplainable lust for rescuing people and vanquishing evil. One day whilst at the office, his long time crush Helpless Damsel is stolen for no good reason by the dastardly Russian ex-military turned treacherous mastermind, Dimitri Kozlovich. Max battles the armies of a Pharaoh GodKing resurrected by Dimitri in order to gain access to Poland, where they engage in a spectacular high budget showdown culminating in the vanquishing of Dimitri and the rescuing of Helpless Damsel. Max then plants an american flag onto the top of a mountain they are on for some reason and gets with the girl whilst Rex, his dinosaur, cracks witty one-liners for comic relief. Also showing in 3D.
Running out of time...
This cannot fail.
- By HelloolleH
- "I am just so musclebound and cool" said Max as he had sex with 18 females.
- "Yes you are" said one as they had the sex.
This was Just an ordinary day in the life of Max HeroMuscle, who was just an office worker from America. Then all of a sudden Helpless Damsel was stolen!
- "Oh no!" He said and Dimitri laughed and ran off. With the girl.
- "I shall get you for this you evil genius"! He said and gave chase and then he fought off the armies of the GodKing Pharaoh who had been resurrected and then he was in Poland.
- "I have found you!" He said and Dimitri said "Yes you have".
They began to battle and Max was winning but then Dimitri used his laser vision but he missed and hit Rex the dinosaur and this made Max angry and he used his strength to throw Dimitri off of the cliff.
- "No you threw me off the cliff" He said as he was dead.
- "Thank you for rescuing me" she said and he put a flag in the mountain and Rex was dead and they kissed.
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