Pornstar Barbie

Usually mistaken for the Paris Hilton Barbie, Pornstar Barbie is in fact an improved version of the Pamela Anderson Barbie.

History

Pornstar Barbie was influenced strongly by the Second Base Barbie of the 1950s, where she was marketed as the first Barbie to wear a skirt with a hemline abover her knees. She later influenced 1970s Free Love Barbie, who was discontinued because she came with a blunt and syringe included.

Sexually abused by her Uncle Bimbo in high school, she became promiscuous, and it showed sharply on her marks. An affair with her Maths teacher helped her pass.

Pornstar Barbie went to an Ivy league college, but she flunked out (not before making various home movies with the girls in her sorority).

Personal Life

While the original Barbie lives a rich and fulfilling life in her Malibu beach house with Ken, Pornstar Barbie lives in a trailer in Alabama. She enjoys Spam, Cheese Whiz, Pepsi, cock, and Marlboro (menthol) cigarettes. She spends her days watching Maury, and her nights hitting the clubs with her ladies.

So What the Hell Happened to Ken?

There have been many rumours about what happened to Ken. One rumour is that he moved to South Park and lives under the name Kenny McCormick. Another is that he started the band Ken and the Horny Men with Sephiroth as lead bass and Goku on drums. He had also been rumoured to be shacked up with Don't Ask, Don't Tell G.I. Joe. The final and least painful of the various possibilities is that he simply committed suicide.

See also

This article was too bizarre for Uncyclopedia,   but Illogicopedia loves random stuff.

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• Australian Barbie
• Cheap Ho' Barbie
• Child porn