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Pornography is rife with innuendo the likes of which will probably get you fired from your place of work.

Pornography is a form of literature popular amongst the population of the world. Though it has its knockers (and plenty of them), by which I mean boobs, they are increasingly of the male variety. Needless to say, man boobs are not in the least bit attractive to editors of Playboy, so sales of said publication are on a rapid decline.

In its place, pornsumers are provided with the internet, which, as everybody knows, is for porn - every single kind, in fact, from Wellington boot and finger fetishism to back shaving and deep sea diving (you don't want to know what that one's about). To find said pornography, first check whether it is legal in your community, ignore that law, then load up the BBC website. Here, you can find footage of almost any animal 'doing it' to enjoy to your heart's content.

Just remember to close the curtains first.

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