Life Analogies

“Life is when a creature is alive."”

~ Captain Obvious on life in outer space

“Life is like elmo, it's red, wooly and "knows where to hit you!"”

~ Big Bird on looking out for danger

“Life is me but not me, sort of like this but not dis this. Help me out here Gary!”

~ Gibbering idiot on failing to speak properly or remember his chain of thought during an interview about life.

“Life is like Porn, it's enjoyed by billions and created by bearded men”

~ Man caught m*sturbating by his mother on mixing his life analogy up with a mental image.

“Go ask your mother”

~ Confuddled man on life's deeper issues

“Life is like death, except with life in it.”

~ A Poor-Man's Philosopher on the rise of terrorism in southern america

“Life is like a rainforest, except you probably have more parrots.”

~ Dennis the Menace on how gay Walter is

“Life is like a toilet, although it is less toilety and has more toilets, unless of course you are a toilet, in which case you remind me of God lol."”

~ Noel Edmunds

“Life is sorta like, um, yeah.”

~ Person with creativity issues

“Life is like a hardcore gay porno, in that I am currently watching one involving a fish head, and my my, the things that boy can do with his hair, which brings me to the conclusion that I have just revealed my penchant for rent boys and shall henceforth eat myself, insofar as it may be, so it seems.”

~ John Prescott (just ignore him)

“Life is like a box of chocolates. You always get eaten.”

~ A man made out of chocolate

“Life is like an extinguished joke that eventually, after previous hilarity, causes people to lose footing and come up with really crap things in an article”

~ This article on itself

“Life is like URDAD lolz”

~ Death Cheese on how wooden your acting skills are

“Life is like, something involving hotness”

~ Paris Hilton on battle scars

“Life is similar to the fact that I require you to add to this article, now, slag!”

~ Ross Kemp on forcing you to write a Barry Scott quote, a quote involving the word Wang and to follow the adverts on this webpage until your computer gets a virus

“Life is like a knife, it's short, sharp, spelt kinda wrong, and why the fuck is it in my che-”

~ Person who literally just got murdered