WHO SAID THAT?

OK, I just heard someone say something. What did you say? Tell me.

I want to know. I know you're talking about me behind my back, laughing and joking with your so-called "friends". Just tell me what you're saying. OK then, fine - I'll make you a deal. I'm not going to brutally choke you till you pass out and slice your decaying corpse into confetti to be strewn upon a parade of murderous rage if you tell me what you just said.

Still not gonna tell me, eh? OK then! I'll make you another deal. If you tell me what you said, I'll give you half my cookie.

Oh, come on! Half a cookie and you won't tell me what you said? Well, I don't give a crap. Don't tell me. It's not like I care...

Okay, reverse psychology doesn't work on you. Please tell me what you said? Pretty please with a cherry, a banana, some chicken, a duck, a Nintendo Wii, a car, a house and some b00f on top?