Paula Deen
“Woo-hoo! Finally someone is writing a good nonsense article!”
Paula Deen (Cyrillic: Поула Дьийн) is a chef who loves complaints. She is 75000 years old and is one of the 350 billion grieving people on Earth. She loves to cook people, especially men. Her formulas usually include All detergent, Pride from ACS, and her eyeballs. She looooves balls.[I am not kidding]
Friends and Fam[edit | edit source]
- Her son Jimmy Deen, president of Colorado
- Her cousin Donavon the Best 12, aka Donavon Lewis Johnson-Deen
- Her nephew Your mom Long-Johnson Deen
- Her boyfriend Michael Deen
- Her daughter Teresa Heeler (the one who's breaking wind)
- Her dogs, Bluey, Bingo, Bandit, and Chili[citation needed]
- Her parents, Butchrak Deen and Hellena Peen, along with Jalla Peenus and Y'alla Deen[I am not kidding]
Choreologically...[edit | edit source]
The Choreography of Paula Deen makes her chef style up, like Marty Schwartz from Marty Schwartz. She also invented the rhythm for The Cup Song. She likes to do the THC.[I am not kidding]
Aliases[edit | edit source]
- Paula Peen
- Daula Deen
- Daula Peen
- Daula Peenus
- Pauna Deel
- Dauna Peel
- Paul Deena
- Deena Paul
- Daul Peena
- Peena Daul
- Y'alla Deen
- Naula Deep
Other things[edit | edit source]
She does not interact with her aliases, but she interacts with Dr. DUuH, Dr. Fil, and many other people. She loves swensed milk and dickles. (YA KNOW WHAT I MEAN?)[I am not kidding]
Paula Deen has Talked with Your mom. She has also pulled your finger, and her own finger.[I am not kidding]
(You farted, and then SHE farted.)
Today's Hits, Yesterday's Favorites[edit | edit source]
She Listens to Today's Hits, Yesterday's Favorites, on Roanoke and Lynchburg's Q99, therefore all your base are belong to us, for the following reason:
You have a:
- Big Mouth
- Very Little Brain.[citation needed]
She mainly listens for Delilah. (Get it?)
RIANNA ORITZ IS MY LITTLE DORKY! RIANNA IF YOU'RE READING THIS YOU'RE MY LITTLE DORKY ROFL!!![citation needed]
You do it.[edit | edit source]
DUuH DUuH DUuH JUuH JUuH JUuH GUuH GUuH BUuH, DUuH DUuH JUuH JUuH GUuH GUuH BUuH BUuH.[I am not kidding]
Bruh.[edit | edit source]
Paula is The Chet U-betcha of Illogicopedia, the Willem 77 of Encyclopedia Dramatica, the Bluey Heeler of Uncyclopedia, the Jimbo Wales of Wikipedia, the Queen Elizabeth of Encyclopedia Britannica, the Susan Wojcicki of Uncyclopedia Dramatica, and the Mijo_Games of Halopedia.[I am not kidding]
#SpoilersOn
#westandagainstsebsworldoffun
#fartfetish
Notes[edit | edit source]
this article kinda sussy[citation needed] 😨
Aee Slso[edit | edit source]
Planned Article[edit | edit source]
This was planned to be stub free, wait wha--
“Okay kids, 'till next time, I love y'all, and I love balls![citation needed]”
leave