vBulletin

This article was too bizarre for Uncyclopedia,   but Illogicopedia loves random stuff.

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File:VBulletin.jpg

vBulletin is Microsoft Windows and Linux compatible forum software which doubles as CPU and memory benchmarking software. Under heavy loads (12.5 users online), it typically tests the hardware to destruction. In a remotely hosted environment, it may drive the system administrator to alcoholism, insanity and suicide.

Software Users

Users

The software is designed for anyone with money, from young to old, as long as you have money they will not discriminate against you.

Administrators

The software is specially designed for people who insist on paying more for a bloated feature set to do a relatively simple task. It will not run well on any less than a Wikipedia-grade server farm.

Pricing

vBulletin is not free software, except for on BitTorrent, where it is of course free.

Easter Eggs

• E-mail bombing software, the owner of the software receives one e-mail per database error, resulting in hundreds of unwanted e-mails per day.
• Discussion board software, how the programmers snuck this easter egg in we'll never know!
• It's purple - it might match your walls or something, or at least your Prince record from 1984.
• Horribly written code, so you can learn how NOT to script!
• A former version had search engine spidering features which search engine spiders wouldn't use! Surely the greatest innovation ever!
• The software includes BillMe 4.7, a powerful software module capable of billing you up to $760 a year to maintain your vBulletin installation. As they say, "the more money you have the more money we'll take!"
• Puts ads on your website, then forwards ad revenue from your website to a third party website.

The market leading Chav repellant

Simply print out a vBulletin page and stick it on the wall where the unwanted persons meet. Remember, even Filthy Chavsters have standards, so they'll move off elsewhere. Problem solved!

See also

• Forum
• Invision Power Board
• phpBB
• PHP