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Tequila is the 3rd biggest export from Mexico after Crystal Meth and Taco's. It smells like methylated spirites, looks like methylated spirits and tastes like methylated spirits.

A really, really bad form of vodka it is made from fermented cacti. Drinking a whole bottle in one night is a 100% sure way to wake up with a pounding headache in a decrepit jail cell the next morning owing to its 40% alcoholic content. Bonus points are awarded if you can remember why you are in jail.

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