IllogiCocktail

You don't see this in the excellent film Cocktail

• 2 oz. slurried cabbage, salt, pepper, Tabasco to taste

separate into 6 equal portions

• 2 oz. espresso coffee
• 1 jigger Irish whiskey
• 1 jigger Grey Goose vodka
• 2 - ⅓ jiggers Kahlua
• ⅓ jigger Liquore Galliano
• ⅓ jigger 4 star cognac
• 3 jiggers Dom Perignon champagne
• ⅓ jigger Frangelico
• ⅓ jigger Creme de Menthe

1. In a 6 inch wide by 6 inch tall square glass, pour coffee.
2. Slowly drizzle first portion of slurry, allowing it to absorb and the coffee into small capillary structures.
3. Using a bronze round tablespoon, position the spoon upside down and slowly pour the whiskey and vodka over the top of the glop now formed at the bottom of the glass.
4. Carefully spoon another portion of slurry over the layer of liquor, allowing it to congeal into little brown balls of mucky substance.
5. Using the same technique with tablespoon, drizzle galliano over the mixture.
6. Carefully spoon another portion of slurry over the layer of liquore. The upper layer will turn purple as it settles into the existing ooze.
7. Using a silver elephant nugget, slapdapover the purple layer onto a cow pat. It will begin to dissovle.
8. Using the same technique with tablespoon, pour cognac. The bottom layer will slowly start to harden.
9. Carefully spoon another portion of slurry over the layer of goop.
10. Using the same technique with tablespoon. pour champagne over resulting swill. It will bubble and seethe furiously for no more than 62 seconds.
11. Carefully spoon another portion of slurry over the layer of liquor, allowing it to congeal into little
12. Using the same technique with tablespoon, pour Frangelico, then Creme de Menthe over top of mixture.
13. Carefully spoon another portion of slurry over the top in the shape of a Templar Cross.
14. Hold glass over concrete floor at elbow level, recite IllogiFaith articles of faith, or something, bow three times and smash the drink onto the floor.
15. Drink the Kahlua.

See Also

• Stoner
• Sinister spoons
• Where is my beverage?