User talk:Kuolioinen

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Archives: 2012—2015
[edit source]

Whether it's through compulsory community service for crimes we won't go into or just personal choice, you've just joined illogicopedia. First and foremost, may I take your coat *rifles through the pockets*.

This greeting if not nailed to your forehead (or applied forcefully with No More Nails) is most likely from an admin/werewolf/Jonas the Happy Vandal/Sysop which makes it excellent, so RELAX. Now we're all relaxed, I'll quickly get through the bits you need to know (rules and where to go etc, and my bribe of course):

  • If you're actually a vandal then prepare to be squashed by an oversized novelty sandal.
    Duck patrol2.JPG
  • If you're a complete beginner to wiki's then you may want to click here.
  • If you're nibbling on any cheese or cookies at the moment, STOP! ...Hammer Time! Those are for Santa - our resident stuttering old perv.
  • Just so you know what we're about (the life drawing class is left of that pop-up) I'd advise clicking here. I have to emphasise the section "In comparison to other wikis", just incase you're a fleeing uncyclopedia/uncycling flea user etc.
  • Any featured work will be rewarded with a gold star (to put on your Christmas tree) whilst any !$"?@#!1*&!! work will be rewarded with a swift slap to the chops.
  • If you turn out to infact be a brilliant user and aren't at this point laughing at the huge crater you've made where the Illogia once stood then you could be elidgible for Writer of the Month (or at least an unofficial Insane/Dedication award). If all else fails drink holy water and watch as a big hole-y forms through your heart.
  • If it all goes horribly wrong and the police find your stash of Nuclear warheads, have broken into your house, and the ghost busters are unavailable then you should probably franticly claw for help in the direction of these guys.
  • If you want to wear a funny wig and sit in a house full of commoners or lards then a political party membership may be for you. I recommend the Strangled Cats party.
  • When we finally figure out you're the user that keeps stealing our pocessions we're going to need to keep in touch with you (so we can get a clear shot at ya :P). So please feel free to leave comments on user's talk pages or our sparkling forum. You can talk to us directly on our IRC chatroom.
  • Now all that's left is the complimentary welcoming mint, and my bribe. £<insert number with more zeroes than Binary Code at the end of it here> please. Make all cheques payable to hell.

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Welcome to Illogicopedia, Kuolioinen! Your Arctic-Lull on Psychodykkomycchonecropheliadiabetes was fantastic! spastic and full of plastic!

Oh.

That's
not
me.

Well, it seems like you've got quite a good incentive as to what the point of this oxymoronically (yes that's not a word) pointless website is.

Welcome to Illogicopedia, User:Kuolioinen! We hope that you choke choose to persist in your illogical episodes of neurotic psychopathy, as seen in your first article! Eat the spawn of Cthulhu, sleep in their bodies when stranded in Hoth, and SHRIGIS!!!

Also, create a user page.

Phrubub nose teh cheddar cheez. 2+2=5 SPEAK TO ME, ILLOGIAN! Past accounts of sodomy RAVENOUS AND RUTHLESS CAPITALISM The greatest article in the history of Illogia! 00:14, 16 Aym 2016 (UTC)

Did you know that my name translates into necrotic or gangrenous? I have so many ideas centered around sickness I might as well get a doctorate of it in here. --I don't exist 18:20, 16 Aym 2016 (UTC)

If there was any doubt left...[edit source]

...then I can confirm that this foolish fool was me a year ago. I, on the other hand, was the other two gentlemen alleged by this foolish fool to be his pre-incarnations. 3RG0T15T ~offer sacrifices~ 20:40, 16 Aym 2016 (UTC)

Ah, then you are free to revert my reverts, now that there is sufficient explanation. Monkey-butler.jpg Sincerely, islandmonkey - go speak 05:58, 17 Aym 2016 (UTC)
No worries about that, nor about the talk pages. They're all stored in one big archive. I would also be very much pleased if Ergotist's phantom powers were transferred to me seeing as I don't use that account anymore. --Dokktrott Ausenbeier Mitfonnakk (make an appointment) 06:25, 17 Aym 2016 (UTC)

Quite the sock-puppeteer. [Snarf]].[edit source]

Amazing, how your sock-puppetry spanned the course of 3 years.

Amazing.

Yup. Puy. vfomvofvneon.

Do you think you can VOTE for an article? Please? 2+2=5 SPEAK TO ME, ILLOGIAN! Past accounts of sodomy RAVENOUS AND RUTHLESS CAPITALISM The greatest article in the history of Illogia! 03:39, 18 Aym 2016 (UTC)

I don't really believe in elections per se, but I'll consider nonetheless. Furthermore, I don't see how my actions count as sock-puppetry seeing as I abandoned my previous accounts one after another. --Dokktrott Ausenbeier Mitfonnakk (make an appointment) 08:09, 18 Aym 2016 (UTC)

Another sockpuppet?[edit source]

Is it going to happen? XY007 (talk - contribs - business) 04:26, 2 Yoon 2017 (UTC)