IllogiZoo:Purple monkey

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Purple Monkey
PURPLE monkey for web.gif
Conservation Status
Kingdom Animalia
Phylum Chordata
Class Mammalia
Order Primates
Family Cercopithecidae
Genus Ruby Slippers
Species F. Slippers
Weight 9 - 17 kg. (avg)
Length 0.7 - 1.8 meters
Binomial Name
Fastidious Slippers

The purple monkey is a pet that costs $3.14 in the shops, two pounds of cheese in the market and a load of poopy in the swamp.

The purple monkey gives the owner +5 resistance, 5+ attack power and a whopping +15 excretion, which means the owner becomes incontinent. This is bad.

The purple monkey may cause seizures during its mating season. Cheese has been known to stop these problems, however, this has yet to be confirmed by seizureologists. Leading seizureologist Dr. E. Phil Epictic thinks the cheese story is a plot by the cheese companies to make people buy cheese to stop their purple monkey giving them a seizure. Dr. L. Ron Hoobart, his colleague, agrees.

See also[edit | edit source]


Coleco AdamDonkey KongFunky Chunky MonkeyGibbonHong KongI am a monkeyInfinite monkey theorumJib JabKing KongMonkeysMonkey DeafMonkey Sword FightsMy life as a monkey, olive, pet and a peanut.Purple monkeySock monkeysThe Evil Keyboard MonkeyThe MonkeesViolate the monkeyWrongful Monkey Suit