HHO Gas

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HHO gas is a new paradigm for the new millennium. It can be used as a clean, efficient fuel and it can burn stuff at thousands of degrees. The gas was discovered by some guy who thought it was very boring that two H's (heliums) always converts into H2 (two hamsters).

How it works?[edit | edit source]

It's magic!

No, really[edit | edit source]

Let's look at the process. We start with H2O, from which we form "HHO", with O2 and H2 as waste products. To summarize: 2H2O --> 2HHO --> 2H2 and O2. By conservation of energy, this process should make the same energy as 2H2O --> 2H2 and O2, which you lose energy trying to perform because it's endothermic. However, 2H2O --> 2HHO --> 2H2 and O2 releases energy. Where does the extra energy come from?

The answer to this lies in advanced quantum physics, something which you'd only learn after years and years of long, painful hours of education and lab]work. But since you're so [nice, I'll let you in on the secret: pixies. Yes, pixies. These tiny fairies rub the hydrogen and oxygen molecules until they get all hot and excited. (I thought] I'd never] have to say that sentence again.) This gives the reaction the energy it needs to be worthwhile.

C'mon, pixies?[edit | edit source]

There is an alternate theory involving leprechauns:

  • Ac[cording to Einstein (and who's going to argue with what he says) mass has energy according to E = mc^2.
  • Leprechauns are made of matter, hence they contain energy.
  • Leprechauns are attracted to gold.
  • Whoever's scamming the Public with this HHO nonsense is making a lot of gold.
  • Thus, leprechauns flock to HHO molecules, and the higher concentration of energy makes the reaction exothermic.

You don't really expect us to swallow that leprechaun crap, do you?[edit | edit source]

I do. Nutty, isn't it? But for the more skeptical among you, I have one last theory: kitten huffing. Kitten's contain mass, hence they have energy. When you huff kittens, you get all screwed up. Kittens are small, so small, in fact,

“All yuor HHO are belong to US!!!”

~ John Malkovich on The Badger King

that if a molecule were to huff anything, it'd have to be a kitten. Now, HHO is clearly screwed up since it's regular orientation is H-O-H, which is H2O. Thus HHO is H2O after H2O huffed kittens. Since HHO has kittens in it, it must be more massive, accounting for the energy needed to make the reaction exothermic.

What does exothermic mean, anyway?[edit | edit source]

This refers to wearing your long johns over your pants and looking like a demented exhibitionist.

See also[edit | edit source]

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For those who can't handle the real truth, the spinners of fake truth at Wikipedia have a thoroughly boring article on HHO Gas.