HowTo:Go to Orpington
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Orpington is a mysterious land far away from everything else. Here is how you get there:
- Go to London King's Cross Station.
- Run through the barrier of platform 0.
- Hail a helicopter from the roof.
- Fly to Hindley.
- Take a bus. Ask if it goes to Orpington.
- If the driver says 'No', get off the bus, if the driver says 'Yes', buy a ticket.
- Go as far as Manchester by bus, then take a train from Victoria. Soon you will arrive at Jordanhill railway station.
- From there, hire a private plane. Fly above the clouds, then above the rainbow, you will arrive at The Ism Party HQ.
- At the HQ, enjoy some cake, then hail a taxi. Wait months through the drive to the day the driver finally says, 'yes it goes to Orpington'.
- A few years later, you arrive at Subbuteo. Its capital is Orpvingzon.
- That's the best you can ever get to Orpington, I'm sorry. I went to heaven in a taxi before.
- Not what you expected eh?